What writing has been teaching me lately.
This week, while working on both the Billy and Molly series and I Dare You, Teacher, I realized how much my own writing has changed.
Months ago, I often approached difficult ideas the way a courtroom lawyer approaches a witness. My instinct was to expose contradictions, challenge assumptions, and prove that a particular belief could not withstand careful questioning.
There was a time when that felt like the pursuit of truth.
But somewhere along the way, something changed.
Now, before I ask whether a person is right or wrong, I find myself asking a different question:
What has it been like to become this person?
That question has changed the way I write.
When I return to an old manuscript, I no longer want to defeat a character. I want to understand him.
I want to know what he feared.
What he inherited.
Who first taught him to see the world the way he does.
What losses shaped him.
What hopes kept him going.
Understanding does not require agreement.
Some beliefs still deserve to be questioned. Some actions still cause real harm. Honest inquiry has not become less important to me.
But I have become less interested in winning arguments and more interested in understanding people.
Ironically, that shift has made my writing more honest.
Characters are no longer representatives of ideas.
They are people.
The same is true outside the page.
Most of us encounter others by standing across from them. We defend our conclusions, compare our convictions, and wait for an opportunity to respond.
What if, at least for a moment, we stood beside them instead?
Not to surrender our own judgment.
Not to abandon what we believe.
But to understand what it has been like to become the person standing in front of us.
Perhaps truth is pursued most faithfully when understanding comes before judgment.
Writing keeps teaching me that.
Continue with The Pencil’s Edge
A Pencil Practice
Think of someone whose beliefs, choices, or conclusions are very different from your own.
Before deciding whether you agree or disagree, pause for a moment and ask yourself one quieter question:
What has it been like to become this person?
Understanding does not require agreement.
But it often begins with curiosity.
Today, make one honest mark by trying to understand before you judge.
When you have finished, the practice is complete.
Listen
Prefer listening?
Listen to today’s Reflection on Spotify.
Subscribe
New Reflections are published every Monday and Thursday morning at The Pencil-Driven Life.
The Pencil-Driven Life 